In December 2020, Elliot Page, the acclaimed actor known for his roles in Juno and The Umbrella Academy, took a monumental step in his personal journey by coming out as transgender. In a heartfelt Instagram post, he shared his truth with the world, stating, “Hi friends, I want to share with you that I am trans, my pronouns are he/they and my name is Elliot.” Since then, Elliot Page has been open about the highs and lows of his gender transition, including how he responds when someone misgenders him. This article delves into Elliot Page’s experiences and his thoughtful approach to handling misgendering, offering insights into his journey and advice for allies.
A Disturbing Encounter at the Drive-Thru
Elliot Page’s announcement in 2020 was not just a personal milestone but also a significant moment for the LGBTQ+ community. His declaration, “I love that I am trans. And I love that I am queer,” resonated deeply with many, as it highlighted the importance of self-acceptance and the freedom to live authentically. Page’s openness about his identity provided visibility for trans individuals and sparked conversations about the challenges faced by the trans community, particularly the ongoing issues of harassment, violence, and discrimination.
In his announcement, Page also expressed his solidarity with other trans people, saying, “To all the trans people who deal with harassment, self-loathing, abuse, and the threat of violence every day: I see you, I love you, and I will do everything I can to change this world for the better.” This commitment to advocacy has remained a central theme in Page’s public life, as he continues to use his platform to promote understanding and acceptance.
The Impact of the Incident: “It Was Devastating”
Misgendering, the act of referring to someone using incorrect pronouns or gendered language, is a common experience for many transgender people. For Elliot Page, navigating misgendering has been part of his journey, and he has spoken candidly about how he chooses to respond when it happens.
In an interview with The Guardian, Page discussed a scene from his film Close to You, where his character corrects his onscreen mother after being misgendered. When asked if the moment was genuine, Page revealed that it was, but he added that he doesn’t dwell on being misgendered unless it’s meant to be hurtful. “I feel weird because I get misgendered all the time, and I don’t care unless someone’s trying to…,” he explained. This approach underscores Page’s understanding that mistakes happen, and intent plays a significant role in how he reacts.
Page also shared that in real life, he doesn’t always correct people when they misgender him, especially if it’s a genuine mistake. He emphasized the importance of moving on quickly from such moments to prevent them from becoming bigger issues. “I’d be like: ‘It’s fine. We’re going to move on from the moment. It takes a second.’” This response highlights Page’s patience and resilience, as well as his focus on maintaining positive interactions rather than dwelling on errors.
Seeking Justice: Vanzego’s Response and Call for Action
Elliot Page has also spoken about his experiences with misgendering within his own family. In his interview, he mentioned that his mother, Martha Philpotts, sometimes slips up with his pronouns. However, Page is understanding and compassionate, recognizing that it takes time for loved ones to adjust. “She’s pretty good. I’m like, ‘Of course, it’s going to take you a second, Mom. It’s fine. You don’t need to beat yourself up about it!’” This perspective reflects Page’s empathy and his acknowledgment that transitioning is a process not just for the individual but also for those around them.
Page’s attitude towards his mother’s occasional mistakes is a powerful reminder of the importance of patience and understanding in relationships, particularly when navigating new aspects of identity. His willingness to forgive and move forward shows how essential it is to maintain supportive and loving connections during the transition process.
Calls for Accountability: “He Needs to Learn from This”
As someone who has been in the public eye for many years, Elliot Page understands the challenges that come with being a visible trans person. He also recognizes the importance of allyship and has offered advice to those who want to support the trans community but may be afraid of making mistakes.
“For me, it’s about people taking individual time to educate themselves,” Page said in an interview with Variety. He stressed that there are numerous resources available to learn about trans experiences and that while questions aren’t inherently negative, they should be asked with consideration for context, time, and tone.
Page’s advice emphasizes the importance of proactive learning and self-education for allies. By taking the initiative to understand trans issues, allies can better support their trans friends, family members, and colleagues. This approach not only helps prevent mistakes but also fosters a more inclusive and understanding environment.
Public Reaction: A Divided Response
In his recent film Close to You, Elliot Page’s character, Sam, navigates family dynamics and personal identity, mirroring some of Page’s real-life experiences. The film provides a glimpse into the complexities of being trans and returning to familiar spaces where old habits and perceptions may persist. Page’s performance in Close to You is deeply personal, reflecting his own journey and the challenges that come with living authentically in a world that doesn’t always understand or accept difference.
The film’s exploration of misgendering and the correction that follows offers a powerful narrative on the importance of respect and the impact of even unintentional mistakes. It serves as a reminder that while everyone makes errors, it’s how we handle them and move forward that truly matters.
Conclusion: A Call for Reflection and Change
Elliot Page’s journey as a transgender man has been marked by resilience, understanding, and advocacy. His approach to misgendering, whether in public or private, is characterized by patience and a focus on intent rather than perfection. Through his experiences, Page offers valuable insights into how we can all be better allies to the trans community—by educating ourselves, offering support without fear, and handling mistakes with grace. As he continues to share his story and advocate for change, Elliot Page remains a powerful voice for inclusivity and acceptance in our evolving society.
