When a loved one passes away, it’s a common tradition for their family to publish a heartfelt obituary in the local newspaper to honor their memory. However, not every family chooses to pen a glowing eulogy for the dearly departed. In fact, some would rather use the obituary section to air their dirty laundry and settle old scores, as evidenced by a recent viral case out of Redwood Falls, Minnesota.
The obituary in question was written by the two adult children of Kathleen Dehmlow, a woman who recently passed away. Rather than focusing on the positive aspects of their mother’s life, the estranged siblings used the platform to unleash a scathing tirade against her.
The obit starts off sounding fairly standard, providing the basic details of Dehmlow’s life and death. But as readers continue reading, it becomes clear that these two had a serious bone to pick with their mother. The final paragraph is particularly brutal, stating that “she will not be missed and this world is a better place without her.”
Unsurprisingly, the publication of this highly unconventional obituary sparked widespread public outrage. The Redwood Falls Gazette, the local newspaper that originally published the obit, ended up removing it from their online edition due to the severe backlash.
In a subsequent interview, a member of the Dehmlow family, Dwight Dehmlow, acknowledged the sordid details included in the obituary. However, he also claimed that there was “a lot of stuff that is missing” about their mother’s life and actions. Dwight suggested that while his mother “made a mistake 60 years ago,” she had regretted it over the years, and the obituary writer “decided to go out with hate.”
Many have also questioned why the Redwood Falls Gazette even published the scathing obituary in the first place. According to the paper’s CEO and founder, Stopher Bartol, it is not actually illegal for these paid obituary pieces to be published, no matter how inflammatory the content may be.
Bartol stated that the paper’s partners have “extremely high” content standards, so they haven’t needed to implement independent standards in this area. However, he acknowledged that they “take very seriously the trust placed in us by our partners and the families we together serve,” and would review their procedures going forward.
While the public may never know the full extent of the family’s issues, it’s clear that the Dehmlow siblings harbored deep resentment towards their late mother. The shocking obituary has pulled back the curtain on what was likely a long-simmering family feud.
Some speculate that the “mistake” Dwight referenced may have been an extramarital affair or other betrayal that Kathleen Dehmlow committed decades ago. This could explain the level of vitriol expressed by her children in the final sendoff.
This case serves as a cautionary tale for anyone considering writing an obituary. While it may be tempting to use the platform to air grievances or settle old scores, the public nature of an obituary means that the fallout can be severe. The Dehmlow family is now facing intense scrutiny and backlash for their actions.
Ultimately, an obituary should be a celebration of a life, not a vehicle for vengeance. Those tasked with writing these important memorials would do well to focus on the positive aspects of the deceased, even in the face of complicated family dynamics. The goal should be to honor the memory of the departed, not to further divide the living.
The Kathleen Dehmlow obituary saga is a stark reminder that even in death, family drama can continue to unfold. While the public may never know the full extent of the issues between Dehmlow and her children, the scathing nature of the obituary has struck a chord with readers around the world.
This case serves as a cautionary tale for anyone considering writing an obituary, underscoring the importance of focusing on the positive aspects of a life, even in the face of complicated family dynamics. Ultimately, an obituary should be a celebration of a life, not a platform for airing grievances or settling old scores.