Why Queen Camilla can order Kate Middleton to change her outfit: Inside the rules and etiquette of the Royal Family

When Camilla Parker Bowles first entered the public eye as Prince Charles’ mistress during his marriage to the beloved Princess Diana, the backlash was swift and unforgiving. However, in the years since, the former Parker Bowles has undergone a remarkable transformation, cementing her place as a respected and even beloved member of the royal family.

Camilla’s rise to popularity can be largely attributed to the tremendous amount of responsibility she took on when her husband, now King Charles III, underwent cancer treatment. While the spotlight remained firmly fixed on the heir to the throne, Camilla quietly stepped up, taking on an increasing number of royal duties and engagements. Her unwavering dedication and support for Charles during his time of need did not go unnoticed by the public, who began to see a different side of the once-controversial figure.

Even as Camilla’s popularity has grown, her relationship with other members of the royal family, particularly Kate Middleton, has evolved. Once seen as rivals, the two women have reportedly formed a warm and supportive friendship in recent years. However, with Camilla’s ascension to the role of Queen Consort, some changes have been observed, including the apparent loss of Kate’s autonomy when it comes to her wardrobe choices for official engagements.

The royal family is renowned for its strict adherence to protocol and etiquette, with a seemingly endless array of rules and traditions governing everything from how to greet a royal to the proper way to dine. While some of these guidelines may seem rigid and outdated, they are deeply ingrained in the fabric of the monarchy. From the prohibition on serving shellfish to the expectation that one follows the lead of the King or Queen, navigating the royal etiquette minefield requires a delicate touch.

Despite the strict rules and traditions that govern the royal family, there have been instances where members have boldly defied the established norms. Meghan Markle, for example, is reported to have harbored a dislike for one particular rule, though the details of her rebellion have not been widely publicized. Additionally, other royals have been caught red-handed breaking centuries-old etiquette protocols, demonstrating that even the most hallowed institutions are not immune to the occasional act of defiance.

In his book Gilded Youth: An Intimate History of Growing Up in the Royal Family, Tom Quinn cited a former staff member who claimed that Meghan struggled with one rule during her tenure as a working royal.

The royal source claimed that she “hated being controlled by royal protocol,” for example, when leaving the house.

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One crucial rule within the royal sphere is that family members must always report where they are going before leaving their homes. And Meghan didn’t like this rule. 

“The fact, for example, that at Kensington Palace, royals have to announce in advance when they are leaving the Palace and where they are going,” the royal source told Quinn.

“This is partly for security but partly also to avoid a situation where a senior royal is upstaged by a more junior royal leaving just when the more important person leaves.”

Royal rules regarding etiquette and how one should behave around, for example, the king, are one thing. However, some rules could even apply to young royal family members, for example, when it comes to toys.

When on engagements or walkabouts, it’s common for the royal family to receive many gifts. However, even though it might be a teddy bear suitable for Charlotte or any of her brothers, the children don’t get to decide if they can keep it. So, who does? King Charles.

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According to the Daily Record, a strict rule denies Prince George, Princess Charlotte, and Prince Louis, or William and Kate, for that matter, the right to “own” gifts that are presented to them. According to the news outlet, they have a seven-page handbook regarding receiving gifts, for example, what they can accept, what they must return, and so on.

In other words, a teddy bear given to, for example, William and Kate to be given to Charlotte is not theirs per the rule. It automatically belongs to King Charles.

“Gifts are defined as official when received during an official engagement or duty or in connection with the official role or duties of a member of The Royal Family,” the rule guidance states

“Official gifts are not the private property of the Member of The Royal Family who receives them but are instead received in an official capacity in the course of official duties in support of, and on behalf of The King.”

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So, King Charles owns all the gifts given to royal family members, per the rule. However, in reality, he is a very loving grandpa who ensures his grandchildren receive these beautiful gifts.

However, before a gift can be handed over to the royal children, it must undergo a strict security test. First, it is registered on an official “gift receive form,” the Daily Record reports. Second, the security test proceeds, and if it passes inspection, it can be handed over.

At the same time, for any gift valued under £150, the royal family members can hand it to an aide or give it to any charity they like.

Of course, clothing is another big thing in royal life. King Charles, Prince William, and the other male members always wear the nicest suits, but the women’s attire is a little different.

Over the years, we have seen the now late Queen Elizabeth and Princess Diana, former members such as Meghan Markle and now Queen Camilla and Kate MIddleton, the Princess of Wales, wear amazing outfits combined with extraordinary hats. It’s safe to say that their wardrobes – and the royal jewelry collection – aren’t exactly cheap. But although they can wear many different types of clothing, there are some rules.

Queen Camilla
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In fact, one rule changed just a short while ago, when Camilla became queen.

Speaking with Express, a source close to the queen’s official dresser has revealed Camilla’s unusual demand for Princess Kate and Sophie, the Duchess of Edinburgh, the two other senior royal women. While all three enjoy wearing blue to official royal duties, the queen has a say in whether that’s a go or no-go.

Queen Camilla is highest in rank – and therefore gets the first choice on what to war. The insider told Express that Camila’s official dresser, Jacqui Meakin, initially “ruffled a few feathers” at the Palace due to Camilla’s strict idea of who could wear what color. And in most cases, that includes wearing blue.

Although Camilla was said to be very strict about it at first, later on, Kate and Sophie were allowed to wear the same color, just if it looked different enough.

“The Queen is now able to choose her outfits before all the other women in the Royal Family. It’s part of the royal pecking order and that includes the clothes and colour,” the insider said. “Her Majesty’s favourite colour is blue, and so is Kate’s. Sophie is also quite fond of it.

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The source continued, “There was a time when Jacqui [Meakin] was a bit apprehensive to allow blue to be worn at the same time as the Queen, but she’s relaxed that now as long as the blues are very different shades. In the end, it all became a bit comical with all the ladies seeing the funny side.”

It’s all about dressing properly for the royal family members, but sometimes, even they can have what some might call mishaps, although they were accidental.

Last year, Camilla had a “Marilyn Monroe moment,” but fortunately, the dress stayed down. Yet, it isn’t actually the first time it has happened to her.

When Princess Charlotte was christened at the Church of St Mary Magdalene in Sandringham, Norfolk, Camilla experienced another Marilyn Monroe moment when a strong gust of wind threatened to lift her dress.

Camilla might have had her Marilyn Monroe moments, but she isn’t the only royal to have experienced them.

In 2012, Kate Middleton was caught by a sudden gust as she changed planes in Brisbane, Australia, revealing too much of her legs. Another time, when she and William ended their Canadian tour in 2011, her dress was caught in the breeze, nearly giving fans an eyeful.

It happened again in 2016 while she was laying down a wreath at the India Gate in the Indian capital of New Delhi and again in 2019 while she was practicing archery in Bhutan.

Luckily, Queen Elizabeth II used a very clever trick of having curtain weights underneath her skirt to prevent it from happening. Maybe that’s something Camilla and Kate Middleton should consider as well.

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